Thursday, February 24, 2011

through the looking glass

Today changed my life forever.

Not really. But I guess you could say I had a check off my "bucket list" (can anyone even hear those words without thinking of that movie with Morgan Freeman? I haven't even seen that movie and I think of it every time) except I didn't know it was on my bucket list (Morgan Freeman) until it happened.

I was stuck in standstill traffic, which usually makes me want to claw people to death starting with their eyes and ending with the soles of their feet, when something happened that made me grateful for the few seconds of stagnation that gave me the time to absorb as much as I could.

I pulled up right next to a girl driving my exact same car.

I've always had a love/hate relationship with my car because of the stereotype that comes with it; I do not relate to the typical "bug driver" and I almost resent being put in that category. Luckily, the windows on the other girl's car were just as clear as both my own windows, and the reassuring proof that I definitely DO NOT fall into that category. Even in the little blue monster.

Her bug is in mint condish; paint perfect, all 4 original rims, clean as a whistle, shiny silver license plate frame, flowers in her little dashboard vase. Immaculate. Adorable.
She's in there in her cute little outfit juggling her phone and her mascara, her nails all did, writing in her rhinestone planner with the glitter pen she took out of her giant pink purse. Feminine and put-together. She was probably listening to something by Taylor Swift. Or kesha. Or some other popular pathetic girl singer.

And then there's me. Staring at her. Wearing more of my roommates clothes than my own. My bug looks like it just got back from Nam. The paint has sun damage from never being in a garage. Caked with dirt. Busted headlight. Rims from walmart that are spray-painted black, the vase is empty except for a leaf and some trash. I'm trying to listen to tech9 but my water bottle just spilled all over the passenger seat, totally drenching my ipod making everything sound like distant static. And now traffic's moving. And I'm trying to fix the sound. And soak up the water. And shift gears. And watch bizzarro Madeline, who seems to be unphased by all the commotion transpiring on my side of the black hole.

And then she drove down Paradise and out of my life.


  1. bizarro Madeline sounds a lot like Valerie

  2. I've never laughed so hard at a blog before.

  3. i think you are a typical VW owner, but thats just me.

    either way, im glad your life is filled with enough "stuff" that you dont have an immaculate car all the time.

    youre not making much progress in life shining the shit outta your rims

  4. i'm not bubbly, or girly, or in a sorority, or the kind of girl who gives off that "rape me" vibe.

    but its true, rollin on dubs doesn't get you anywhere. but you'll look bad ass getting there.